Thinking about going out

First of all, remember that you don’t need to go out with anyone at all. Your teenage life can be perfectly happy and full with school, hobbies, plans and the company of friends and family (and perhaps the odd crush).

Second, remember there is no rush. Don’t feel that life is passing you by and you will never find love. You will, some time; and in the meantime you are free to enjoy the company of whoever you like.

Third, even if you do fancy someone, remember you don’t need to go out with them to enjoy their company, or even to flirt with them.

Good reasons to go out with someone

  • You feel attracted to them and they are attracted to you; you are in love.
  • You enjoy spending time in their company, whatever you do together.
  • You are happy to make a commitment to them.

Bad reasons to go out with someone

  • You think it will be the answer to everything that bothers you in your life.
  • All your friends are going out with someone and you feel left out.
  • You feel that it’s now or never.
  • You want to put ‘in a relationship’ on your Facebook status.
  • They have asked you out and you feel sorry for them.
  • They have asked you out and you feel you should say yes.

Good Things about going out with someone  (if they’re nice)

  • You can feel more secure, confident and happy in yourself.
  • You can learn new things from being close to someone else and their lives.
  • You can support each other through difficult times.
  • You have someone to do things with in your free time.
  • You can develop your ability to love, care and compromise – things that help to develop you as a person.

Bad things about going out with someone (even if they’re nice)

  • You may have less time and energy to spend on other areas of your life, such as schoolwork, friends and hobbies.
  • You may be seen as part of a couple rather than a person in your own right.
  • You will not be as free as you used to be to do things with other people.
  • You take on responsibility for another person’s happiness at a time when you have lots to sort out for yourself.

Read more about making the most of crushes:

Crushes and fancying people

If you do decide to go out with someone, you may be interested in the following pages:

Asking someone out/ being asked out
Having a happy relationship
Sort out your relationship differences
Going out – possible issues