“Friends” who don’t deserve the name

Nobody is perfect, not even friends. Even good friends will upset, or annoy you, or let you down. But you can’t call someone a friend at all if they:

  • regularly say horrible things to you
  • always make you feel worse
  • put you down in front of other people
  • aren’t interested in your ideas or plans
  • don’t want you to have other friends
  • make you do things you don’t want to
  • pressure you to change your appearance or clothes or habits
  • blame you for their other problems
  • try to control your life.

And of course, the same applies to you if you do any of this to your friends. This problem may happen if you are part of a clique, but it can also happen just between two friends.

Just like romantic relationships, friendships should be balanced. They should not be about one person trying to control or dominate the other. You may want to end a friendship like this, or you may think there is something worth saving. Read our page on falling out with friends.

You might also be interested in our other pages on friends (and non-friends):

Friends (and non-friends)